Two years, and then we’ll talk.

That was my then boyfriend’s promise. We didn’t talk frequently about a marriage timeline, but we also both knew that we weren’t dating just to date. There were several conversations about our future, and each time he would remind me of the promise he had made to himself to not move toward marriage before he had been with someone for two years. I respected his decision and didn’t ever push him to alter his plan. Secretly, though, it was hard for me at times. I never felt that I was glued to a timeline, but I had arbitrarily landed on a year being the right time for me to know if marriage was on the horizon. It’s not like I was the springiest of Spring chickens anymore! But, I was determined to not be the girl that always talked about marriage or forced the issue to the point of pushing him away. So, I did my best to seal my lips and avoid the big “M” word.

On August 5, 2017, we boarded a plane to spend a week of relaxation in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. We both love to travel but don’t get to do it as frequently as we’d like, so this was an extremely special time for us. It also happened to be just about a month after we passed the official two year mark. That fact was looming over me, so of course I wondered if he maybe had something shiny up his sleeve. I tried so hard to stuff that thought away, though, because the last thing I wanted was to get my hopes up and then be disappointed. Intentionally, I chose to block the idea from my mind and instead focus on simply enjoying every moment the week held in store for us.

However, my plan to ignore the subject was quickly thwarted. Before we even took off, my boyfriend was flipping through an in-flight magazine. He came across an advertisement for wedding bands for males. I’m not sure that he meant to react at all, but he made a grunt of disapproval. It was quick and barely audible, but I caught it. Immediately, my mind went, “Well alright. It’s definitely not happening on this trip!” Because I had already set my intention to expect nothing to happen, it didn’t disappoint or irk me. He had given me assurance that we were on that track, and I felt confident that we were still on that trajectory despite his apparent aversion to wedding bands.

We had an amazing first afternoon, evening, and start of our first full day in Puerto Vallarta. In the late afternoon, we decided to go for a walk on the beach right in front of our resort. As we turned south, away from our resort, we saw a gazebo set at the end of a small jetty. In front of the gazebo were a handful of chairs. Then, we saw a sign that indicated a wedding was about to take place. We passed without acknowledging that it was there, other than to comment on how cute the crabs were that were peppered across the base of the jetty.

The view from our living room. The jetty and gazebo can be seen in the bottom right of the photo.

A little farther down, we stopped to jump in the water. We splashed, swam, and acted like a couple of teenagers in love, playfully flirting and enjoying the light-hearted escape from the normal grind of life. The water was warm and the mushy, gushy emotions were pulling us in tight. It was one of those rare moments where time was irrelevant and everything existed in harmonious unity.

Off the in distance, though, we saw that an evening storm was brewing. See, as much as we love traveling, we’re still novices in the planning department. We have a lot to learn about traveling, and last year that included understanding that ticket prices are an awesome deal in Mexico over the summer….because it’s right in the thick of hurricane season and literally dripping in humidity! With the storm approaching, we decided it was time to get out of the water. We plopped down in the sand to dry off before walking back. At the same time, the wedding back at our resort began. We watched as the bride made her way down the jetty to her beloved groom. As we both observed the timeless ritual, it became a natural point of conversation. We segued into a discussion about weddings and destination weddings specifically. Multiple times during the conversation, my boyfriend began his thoughts with, “If I ever get married…,” and “If my future wife…” I tried to maintain my composure, but I don’t think my level of trying matched my level of success. On the inside, I was panicking. The two letter word hijacked my plan to not think about our future and catapulted it across the Pacific. If his thoughts about marriage were still being lead by the word “if” then what were we doing on vacation in another country together?! If that if was followed by “my future wife” and not punctuated by my name, then we had some serious discussions ahead of us that I didn’t want and wasn’t planning on having.

But, in the moment, I bit my tongue. I needed time to process before I said anything. Plus, I still so badly wanted the week to be wonderful that I didn’t dare say anything that would derail that from happening. My mind, though, was suddenly thrust into turmoil.

We went back to our condo and ceased to discuss anything related to marriage. In fact, I wandered into the bedroom and plopped down on the bed to read while my boyfriend made his way into the living room. I was fighting to keep my mouth shut, and give myself the time I needed to think through the conversation we had just had. At the same time, my boyfriend, who showed no exterior signs of knowing that his words had just stirred up a whirlwind of thoughts in me, was contemplating the fact that he knew he had just thrown a rock into what had been a very serene lake.

The final moments of the sun breaking through the residual storm clouds before it set.

The rain blew over and the last glimmer of sunlight began to peek through the tropical storm clouds. We continued to sit in silence until the sun could no longer be seen. It was then that I heard a loud, abrupt, “Robyn!” Instantly, I bolted into the other room, terrified that something was seriously wrong as the exclamation had been so jarring and sudden after a prolonged period of quiet. My boyfriend was smiling and pointing out of the window from the couch.

“Look,” he said. My eyes followed the path of where he was pointing and saw a Disneyland-esque fireworks display across the bay. A smile slowly spread across my face, and I was sucked into a magical trance as the fireworks drew me out onto our balcony. As I took in the scenery, I noticed that at the same time, there were fire dancers on the beach right in front of our resort. I stood there, leaning on the railing, and reflecting on all the amazing blessings I had been afforded and the fact that I was able to share this beautiful place with the man I loved who had become my best friend. In that moment, life was everything I wanted it to be and so much more. Thoughts of concern no longer infiltrated my mind, and I rested in the fact that I was deeply loved and that love was being returned to me in equal proportion.

My boyfriend crept up behind me and laced his arms through mine, pressing his cheek against my flushed face. I pointed out the fire dancers, and we watched both shows, memorized by the beauty. As the fireworks faded into a dim smoke, he gently spun me around so that I was nose-to-nose with him. He dropped his forehead so that it connected with mine and proceeded to ask me if I knew that I was the last thing he thought about each night and the first thing on his mind when he woke in the morning. Those were the last distinct words I remember, because the next several seconds were a total blur. I’m sure he muttered something like, “I was wondering if you would spend the rest of your life with me. Will you marry me?” What I do remember for sure is watching him drop to one knee and pull a small box out of his pocket.

My jaw dropped to my ankles, my eyes grew to the size of extra large saucers, and I exclaimed, “What?! Are you serious?! Is this for real?!” He stood up and embraced me and assured me that it was very real and that he was very serious. My brain was having a hard time processing what was happening, but my continued iteration of “What?! Seriously?!” quickly transitioned into an endless stream of hugs and kisses. It wasn’t until a couple of minutes had passed that my now fiance asked if I wanted to put on my ring. At that moment I also realized that I had never actually answered his question. Without another second passing, I told him that yes, I would say yes to marrying him a thousand times over, and he placed the ring on my finger. The ring that he designed specifically for me, with the center stone coming from his grandmother’s ring.

My sweet ring the next morning.

There were no surprise photographers or surprise guests waiting in the wings. There was no one there to document the moment he wrapped me in his arms, dropped to his knee, embraced me, or put the ring on my finger. It started with Oscar-worthy acting that threw my mind into an unexpected maze. It hit me when I was least prepared to hear it. And, it was the most amazing, non-ordinary, perfect moment of my life. If I had been in on the planning process, I wouldn’t have changed a thing. My perfect-for-me boyfriend, who became my fiance, who is now my husband outpaced ordinary and gave me the most magical and perfect-for-me proposal.

That was August 6, 2017. Happy engagement-iversary to us!

Our first photo as an engaged couple.